1. |
Falling Down
03:00
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Would you come fall down with me now?
I want to feel numb, and safe.
I know I'm headed in an opposite direction but I'm getting there.
And now I wish disaster wasn't always so close behind me.
My innate reluctance to grow has always been upsetting.
I'm getting there.
I'm not sure when but I'm trying.
I promise.
This is important to relay.
I just wanted this to feel like home.
I will do everything I can to make sure this doesn't break.
You have my word.
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2. |
Empty Palm
03:40
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One more time.
I tell myself it won't be this way forever.
One more lie.
I tell myself
Why have I lost all feeling?
Back porch of your childhood home.
Brings back memories of feeling alone.
Those days are over, you have new mountains to climb.
Don't worry about me, I'll be just fine.
I've been such a frail structure for as long as I remember.
I'm an empty palm; there's nothing in my hands.
A house of cards that's falling down.
Where is my backbone? Where is my pride?
I'm still treading water. I have everything to hide.
Breathe for yourself and not for them.
Struggling to find myself again.
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3. |
Purposeful
04:31
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Why do I have to go when everything I built was purposeful?
Thinking of something that's not there.
I wish it were.
I still imagine how it would be if I didn't let my fears take over me.
And I still pretend that everything isn't falling down in front of me.
So sweep me off my feet and tell me nothing will scare me anymore.
I've been silent all this time, wishing I could be patient in my life but when the lights go out I'm always destined to fall.
I'm always destined to fall.
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4. |
Tentative
03:25
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Navigate through a trench and a maze only to end up in the same place, placing your finger tips on what might be there, and what might be fiction.
What is my vision obstructed by?
It's a stale sense of momentum that plateaued. It's a fork in the road, it's a lump in the throat, it's the inability to float.
I can prove myself wrong, but I can't force a change. I want to open my eyes in every single way.
I can't force a change.
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5. |
Oval
02:45
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Take heed of the motions, don't let it consume your soul in the end.
I know what it's like to pretend.
What am I taken for?
What am I taken for?
Just one with no balance when everything happens at once.
Take heed of the motions, don't let it consume your soul in the end.
I know what it's like to pretend.
I can't exist inside an oval hell.
I realize that permanence for me will never come.
When you're swinging from the chandelier a broken back is imminent for years.
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6. |
Thin Line
02:14
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There's a thin line between being alone and not knowing where to call home.
Breathe for yourself and not for them.
Struggling to find myself again.
I'll grind my teeth until I'm gums
Scratch my hands until the morning comes
I'll pace until the floor becomes a black hole.
I'll write myself off again.
Swallowing syllables whole until all speech is gone.
I would harmonize with the rain but I'm out of key and having doubts.
Calm and adjusted, somber and reposed.
The only time I see is when my eyes are closed.
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7. |
I'll Be Here
02:53
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8. |
Losses
02:16
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Not only late, but absent to my own funeral.
I wonder who was there but it is probably best I don't know anyway.
We die more and more each day becoming overwhelmed by the things we only thought of but never put into action.
I didn't find strength in my losses I just lost myself.
I didn't find strength in my losses I just became overwhelmed.
I always fall back on the days that I waste and the things that I say.
A never-ending circus of regret.
So for now I'm gone.
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9. |
Grey
04:47
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I remember the day I gave up on myself.
It never got better.
Look down on me.
I want to bleed.
Could I have a word?
I'm gone, rest assured.
So I'll write myself off.
I'll fade into grey.
I'll cut all my words off.
I won't hesitate.
I remember the day I lost hope.
I'm still searching for ways to cope.
Look down on me.
I used to be so keen.
Could I have a word?
I'm gone, rest assured.
.
I didn't find strength in my losses i just lost myself.
I didn't find strength in my losses it just brought everything I never felt.
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10. |
Collecting Dust
03:14
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Breathe hope into a fragile mouth and wither away.
Is your heart collecting dust or is the absence of pain enough to bare now?
I promised myself that I'd sort it out but some things I can't live without.
It turns out flawed heartbeats with cavalier minds aren't the hardest to find.
I'll walk away.
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11. |
I'm Trying
03:54
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Can you hear me now?
I am still falling down.
Please don't write me off.
This is all I want.
And I've learned to accept the peace even if it's temporary.
That's how it'll always be.
I'm saying goodbye to me.
My eyes are so red.
I am filled with regret.
I will be the best version of myself I've ever seen.
How long will this last me?
I just want to be someone else.
How long will this last me?
I'm trying to love myself.
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